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Relationship Problems and Depressed Partners
By admin | August 31, 2010
Jane (38) and Joseph (40) had been married for 20 years, with a 16-year-old son. The original presenting relationship problems were that Jane, an active and go-ahead marketing executive, had been suffering from stress and depression the past two years, although she had benefited from cognitive therapy.
One of her main worries, however, was that Joseph was ‘stuck in a rut’ in his work (as a self-employed antique dealer) and that he was ‘deeply depressed’ about it. She spent much of her time worrying about him and thinking about how he could improve his situation, and had drawn up several action plans, all of which he rejected as being unrealistic. In couple therapy it emerged that his ‘depressions’ were not as severe as she thought, and a helpful intervention was when the therapist suggested. that she should stop worrying about him, and that his ‘bad days’ were not the result of depression but of his perfectionistic personality and the current trough in the market.
She became more relaxed about the situation, and the tensions between them decreased considerably as a result. Joseph never took antidepressants, but his attitude to his problems became more optimistic as Jane took less notice of them. Her depression was relieved by the reduction in the marital tensions and her own cognitive therapy.
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